The first time I felt fear I was 41 years old. People have always said I was brave. When I was little, I'd climb the highest tree, and I'd approach any animal fearlessly. I liked challenges. My father used to say, "Good steel can withstand any temperature."
﻿我第一次 感到害怕 是在41岁的时候 人们总是说我很勇敢 小时候，我可以爬最高的树 也可以毫无畏惧得接近任何动物 我喜欢挑战 父亲以前经常说 "好钢可以经受任何温度的烤炼。"
And when I entered into Colombian politics, I thought I'd be able to withstand any temperature. I wanted to end corruption; I wanted to cut ties between politicians and drug traffickers. The first time I was elected, it was because I called out, by name, corrupt and untouchable politicians. I also called out the president for his ties to the cartels.
当我进入哥伦比亚政界时 我以为我能够经受任何考验 我想终结腐败 我想切断政客们与贩毒者之间的联系 我第一次当选 是因为我大胆得说出 腐败且不可冒犯的政客们的名字 我也指出了总统 和卡特尔的共谋关系
That's when the threats started. I had to send my very young children out of the country one morning, hidden, all the way to the airport, in the French ambassador's armored car. Days later, I was the victim of an attack, but emerged unharmed. The following year, the Colombian people elected me with the highest number of votes. I thought people applauded me because I was brave. I, too, thought I was brave. But I wasn't. I had simply never before experienced true fear.
但从那时起我开始受到威胁 我不得不在一天早上把我的小孩们送出国 在去机场的路上，孩子们一直藏在法国大使的装甲车里 数天后 我成为了一次袭击的受害者，但所幸没有受伤 第二年 我又被哥伦比亚人民高票选中 我想人们拥护我是因为我勇敢 我也以为自己很勇敢 但其实不然 我只是还从未经历过 真正的恐惧
That changed on February 23, 2002. At the time, I was a presidential candidate in Colombia promoting my campaign agenda, when I was detained by a group of armed men. They were wearing uniforms with military garments. I looked at their boots; they were rubber. And I knew that the Colombian army wore leather boots. I knew that these were FARC guerrillas.
但2002年2月23日那天 彻底改变了我 那时，作为哥伦比亚总统候选人 我正在准备我的竞选日程 但被一群武装分子绑架 他们穿着军装式制服 我观察了他们的靴子，是橡胶的 我知道 哥伦比亚军队是穿皮靴的 我得以知道他们是FARC游击队
From that point on, everything happened very quickly. The commando leader ordered us to stop the vehicle. Meanwhile, one of his men stepped on an antipersonnel mine and flew through the air. He landed, sitting upright, right in front of me. We made eye contact and it was then that the young man understood: his rubber boot with his leg still in it had landed far away.
从那时起，突然发生了很多事情 武装头目命令我们停车 那时他的一名成员踩在了一枚杀伤性地雷上 被炸飞到空中 当他落回到地面上时，他直挺挺坐着 就坐在我面前 我们发生了目光接触 那位年轻人发现 他的橡皮靴连同他的双腿 被炸飞在了其他地方
(Sighs)
（叹息）
He started screaming like crazy. And the truth is, I felt — as I feel right now, because I'm reliving these emotions — I felt at that moment that something inside of me was breaking and that I was being infected with his fear. My mind went blank and couldn't think; it was paralyzed. When I finally reacted, I said to myself, "They're going to kill me, and I didn't say goodbye to my children." As they took me into the deepest depths of the jungle, the FARC soldiers announced that if the government didn't negotiate, they'd kill me. And I knew that the government wouldn't negotiate.
他开始 疯狂叫喊 实际上 我当时感到－－现在也有同样的感觉，因为那些感受现在很真切 那时我感到 我心里的某个东西正在破裂 他的恐惧影响了我 我大脑一片空白，无法思考 我的大脑僵住了 当我终于回过神来时 我对自己说 “他们会杀死我 而我还没跟孩子们道别。” 当他们把我带进密林深处时 FARC成员宣布 如果政府不进行谈判 他们就杀了我 而我知道 政府是不会谈判的
From that point on, I went to sleep in fear every night — cold sweats, shaking, stomach ache, insomnia. But worse than that was what was happening to my mind, because my memory was being erased: all the phone numbers, addresses, names of very dear people, even significant life events. And so, I began to doubt myself, to doubt my mental health. And with doubt came desperation, and with desperation came depression. I was suffering notorious behavioral changes and it wasn't just paranoia in moments of panic. It was distrust, it was hatred, and it was also the urge to kill.
从那时起 我每天晚上都带着恐惧入睡－－ 冒冷汗 发抖 胃痛 失眠 但是更糟的是我的大脑发生了变化 我的记忆都被抹掉了： 所有电话号码 地址 至亲的人的名字 甚至重大的生活事件 于是 我开始怀疑自己 怀疑自己心理不健康 怀疑带来了绝望 绝望带来了抑郁 我正在遭遇非常糟糕的行为性变化 在恐惧的时候，我不仅仅偏执 还充满不信任 充满仇恨 还有杀人的冲动
This, I realized when they had me chained by the neck to a tree. They kept me outside that day, during a tropical downpour. I remember feeling an urgent need to use the bathroom. "Whatever you have to do, you'll do in front of me, bitch," the guard screamed at me. And I decided at that moment to kill him. And for days, I was planning, trying to find the right moment, the right way to do it, filled with hatred, filled with fear. Then suddenly, I rose up, snapped out of it and thought: "I'm not going to become one of them. I'm not going to become an assassin. I still have enough freedom to decide who I want to be."
我意识到自己有杀人的冲动 是在他们把我的脖子用链条拴在树上 让我一直待在外面 待在热带暴雨中 我记得当时自己迫切需要去厕所 “不管你要做什么， 你就在我眼皮底下做， 贱人。“ 守卫对我吼道 而我 那时决定 要杀死他 接下来的数天里 我计划着，尝试寻找合适的时机和方式 我的心中充满了仇恨 和恐惧 然而突然间 我清醒了过来 我改变了想法 我想 “我不要变成他们那样的人。 我不要当一名刺客。 我仍有足够的自由 来决定 我要成为什么样的人。“
That's when I learned that fear brought me face to face with myself. It forced me to align my energies, to align my meridians. I learned that facing fear could become a pathway to growth. A lot of emotions arise when I talk about all of this, but when I think back, I'm able to identify the steps I took to do it. I want to share three of them with you.
那时我明白了 恐惧促使我面对自我 促使我 调整我的精力 调整我的方向 我懂得了面对恐惧 能使人成长 在我谈论这些时我的情绪很复杂 但当我回顾过去的经历时， 我很明确 我所采取的行动 我想与大家分享其中三个
The first was to be guided by principles. Because I realized that in the midst of panic and mental block, if I followed my principles, I acted correctly.
第一个是 以原则为指导 我意识到 在处于恐慌和精神障碍中时 如果我遵循自己的原则 我就会采取正确的行动
I remember the first night in a concentration camp that the guerrillas had built in the middle of the jungle, with 12-foot-high bars, barbed wire, lookouts in the four corners and armed men pointing guns at us 24 hours a day. That morning, the first morning, some men arrived, yelling: "Count off! Count off!" My fellow hostages woke up, startled, and began to identify themselves in numbered sequence. But when it was my turn, I said, "Ingrid Betancourt. If you want to know if I'm here, call me by my name."
我记得在 在游击队建立的集中营的第一个晚上 那个集中营是建在丛林中间 有12英尺高的栅栏 围着铁丝网 四角都有守卫看守 还有武装人员一天24小时用枪指着我们 第一天早上 来了一些人，他们大喊： “报数！报数！” 我的同伴们都被叫醒，受到了惊吓， 开始按顺序报数 轮到我时 我说， “英格丽德·贝当古 如果你们想知道我是否在这里 叫我的名字。“
The guards' fury was nothing compared to that of the other hostages, because, obviously they were scared — we were all scared — and they were afraid that, because of me, they would be punished. But for me, beyond fear was the need to defend my identity, to not let them turn me into a thing or a number. That was one of the principles: to defend what I considered to be human dignity.
那个守卫非常恼怒 而我的同伴们更加愤怒 因为很明显得，他们感到非常害怕 我们都非常害怕－－ 他们害怕因为我的行为他们会遭到处罚 但对我来说 除了恐惧 我必须捍卫我的身份 不让他们把我当作 一件物品或一个数字 这就是其中的一个原则： 捍卫 我所认为的人的尊严
But make no mistake: the guerrillas had it all very well analyzed — they had been kidnapping for years, and they had developed a technique to break us, to defeat us, to divide us. And so, the second step was to learn how to build supportive trust, to learn how to unite.
但是绝不能出错： 因为游击队对此 很清楚 他们已经从事绑架很多年 他们已经掌握了 让人崩溃的 让人失败和分裂的技巧 因此， 第二步 是学会建立相互支持的信任 学会团结
The jungle is like a different planet. It's a world of shadows, of rain, with the hum of millions of bugs — majiña ants, bullet ants. I didn't stop scratching a single day while I was in the jungle. And of course, there were tarantulas, scorpions, anacondas ... I once came face to face with a 24-foot long anaconda that could have swallowed me in one bite. Jaguars ...
丛林是一个完全不一样世界， 那里到处都是 阴影，大雨， 很成千上万的虫子发出嗡嗡声- 有麻吉蚁、子弹蚁 我在那里的每一天都觉得浑身发痒 当然，那里也有狼蛛、蝎子、水蟒等等 有一次我直面一只24英尺长的水蟒 它本来可以将我一口吞掉 那里还有美洲虎
But I want to tell you that none of these animals did us as much harm as the human beings. The guerrillas terrorized us. They spread rumors. Among the hostages, they sparked betrayals, jealousy, resentment, mistrust.
但是我想要告诉你们的是， 任何一种动物对我们造成的伤害 都比不上人类对我们造成的伤害。 游击队恐吓我们， 他们传播谣言， 他们让人质彼此背叛 嫉妒 怨恨 误解
The first time I escaped for a long time was with Lucho. Lucho had been a hostage for two years longer than I had. We decided to tie ourselves up with ropes to have the strength to lower ourselves into that dark water full of piranhas and alligators. What we did was, during the day, we would hide in the mangroves. And at night, we would leave, get in the water, and we would swim and let the current carry us. That went on for several days. But Lucho became sick. He was diabetic, and he fell into a diabetic coma. So the guerrillas captured us.
我第一次长时间逃离是和卢科 卢科被关押进来的时间比我还长2年。 我们决定用绳子 将我们捆起来 将我们降落到黑水中 那里到处都是水虎鱼和短吻鳄 白天的时候，我们藏在红树林中， 晚上 我们离开红树林，再回到水中， 我们可以游泳，并让水流拖着我们 我们有好几天都是这样的。 但是后来卢科 生病了 他患有糖尿病 发生了糖尿病性昏迷 所以游击队逮到了我们
But after having lived through that with Lucho, after having faced fear together, united, not punishment, not violence — nothing — could ever again divide us. What's certain is, all the guerrillas' manipulation was so damaging to us that even today, among some of the hostages from back then, tensions linger, passed down from all that poison that the guerrillas created.
但是，自从和卢科经历了那次逃离， 我们一起面对恐惧，团结一致， 惩罚，暴力甚至任何事 都不会使我们产生分歧 可以确定的是 游击队对我们的操控给我们造成了非常大的伤害， 以至于直到今天 当时被关押的 那些人质之间 仍然关系紧张 时游击队制造的毒害 被流传了下来
The third step is very important to me, and it's a gift that I want to give to you. The third step is to learn how to develop faith. I want to explain it like this: Jhon Frank Pinchao was a police officer who had been a hostage for more than eight years. He was famous for being the biggest scaredy-cat of us all. But Pincho — I called him "Pincho" — Pincho decided that he wanted to escape. And he asked me to help him. By that point, I basically had a master's degree in escape attempts.
第三步 对我来说非常重要 也是我想送给你们的礼物 第三步是学会如何发展信仰 我想这样解释 约翰 弗兰克 平科 是一位警官 他被关押的时间长于8年 他因为是胆小鬼而出名 但是平科-我叫他平科- 平科决定他要逃离 他请求我帮助他 那个时候，我已经取得了“尝试逃跑”的硕士学位
(Laughter)
（笑声）
So we got started but we had a delay, because first, Pincho had to learn how to swim. And we had to carry out all these preparations in total secrecy. Anyway, when we finally had everything ready, Pincho came up to me one afternoon and said,
所以 我们便开始行动，但是行动被延迟了 因为平科首先必须学会游泳， 而且我们必须对我们的行动计划完全保秘 总之，最后我们准备好了所有的事情 平科有一天下午找到我，他说
"Ingrid, suppose I'm in the jungle, and I go around and around in circles, and I can't find the way out. What do I do?"
英格丽德，假设我正在丛林中， 我一直在转圈圈，找不到出去的路 我应该做什么？
"Pincho, you grab a phone, and you call the man upstairs."
平科 你可以拿起一个电话 打电话给天上的人
"Ingrid, you know I don't believe in God." "God doesn't care. He'll still help you."
英格丽德，你知道我不信仰上帝 上帝不介意，他仍然会帮助你
(Applause)
（鼓掌）
It rained all night that night. The following morning, the camp woke up to a big commotion, because Pincho had fled. They made us dismantle the camp, and we started marching. During the march, the head guerrillas told us that Pincho had died, and that they had found his remains eaten by an anaconda. Seventeen days passed — and believe me, I counted them, because they were torture for me. But on the seventeenth day, the news exploded from the radio: Pincho was free and obviously alive. And this was the first thing he said:
那晚一晚上都在下雨 第二天早上 整个集中营醒在一片骚动中醒来 因为平科逃跑了 他们迫使我们拆除营地，开始跋涉， 在行走中， 游击队首领告诉我们平科已经死了 他们已经找到了他的身体的一些残余 他的遗体被水蟒吃了 17天后 相信我，我确定数了是17天，因为那些天对我来说简直是一种莫大的折磨 但是第17天 收音机里有一条爆炸式新闻 平科事实上已经自由了，很显然他还活着 他说的第一句话是：
"I know my fellow hostages are listening. Ingrid, I did what you told me. I called the man upstairs, and he sent me the patrol that rescued me from the jungle."
我知道我的同伴们在收听 英格丽德 我按你说的做了 我给天上的人打电话了 他派来了巡逻队将我从丛林中解救了出来
That was an extraordinary moment, because ... obviously fear is contagious. But faith is, too. Faith isn't rational or emotional. Faith is an exercise of the will. It's the discipline of the will. It's what allows us to transform everything that we are — our weaknesses, our frailties, into strength, into power. It's truly a transformation. It's what gives us the strength to stand up in the face of fear look above it, and see beyond it. I hope you remember that, because I know we all need to connect with that strength we have inside of us for the times when there's a storm raging around our boat.
那是一个不同寻常的时刻 因为 恐惧会蔓延 但是信仰同样如此 信仰不是理性的也不是感性的 信仰 是毅力的一种表现 是毅力的一种训练 信仰可以让我们发生很大改变 可以将我们的弱项和脆弱 转变为强项和力量 是一种实实在在的转变 信仰给予我们力量 让我们直面 恐惧 不被恐惧困住 超越恐惧 我希望你们能够记住这一点 因为我认为我们都需要 与我们内在的那股力量发生连接 让我们度过艰难的时期
Many, many, many, many years passed before I could return to my house. But when they took us, handcuffed, into the helicopter that finally took us out of the jungle, everything happened as quickly as when they kidnapped me. In an instant, I saw the guerrilla commander at my feet, gagged, and the rescue leader, yelling:
许多许多年之后 我才得以回到我的家 当他们给我们戴上手铐坐进直升飞机时 他们终于将我们带离了丛林， 所有事发生的如此之快，就像他们绑架我时一样 一眨眼之间 我看到游击队队长站在地面上 哑口无言 而救援队队长 高呼
"We're the Colombian army! You are free!"
“我们是哥伦比亚军队！ “你们自由了”
The shriek that came out of all of us when we regained our freedom, continues to vibrate in me to this day.
我们所有人 发出了尖叫声 因为我们重获了自由 直到今天，我仍然能感受到尖叫声在我的胸腔内振动
Now, I know they can divide all of us, they can manipulate us all with fear. The "No" vote on the peace referendum in Colombia; Brexit; the idea of a wall between Mexico and the United States; Islamic terrorism — they're all examples of using fear politically to divide and recruit us. We all feel fear. But we can all avoid being recruited using the resources we have — our principles, unity, faith. Yes, fear is part of the human condition, as well as being necessary for survival. But above all, it's the guide by which each of us builds our identity, our personality.
现在 我知道他们可以使我们所有人发生分歧 他们可以以恐惧操控我们 哥伦比亚为和平进行全民投票中的否决票 英国脱欧 想在墨西哥和美国之间建一堵墙 伊斯兰恐怖主义 这些都是为政治目的使用恐惧的例子 以恐惧使人们产生分歧并操控人们 我们都会感到恐惧 但是我们可以避免被恐惧所操控 我们需要利用我们所具有的资源，包括原则，团结，信仰 恐惧是人不可或缺的一部分 是生存所必须的 但是，最重要的是 恐惧指引我们每一个人建立 身份和个性
It's true, I was 41 years old the first time I felt fear, and feeling fear was not my decision. But it was my decision what to do with that fear. You can survive crawling along, fearful. But you can also rise above the fear, rise up, spread your wings, and soar, fly high, high, high, high, until you reach the stars, where all of us want to go.
坦白说，41岁时我才第一次感到恐惧 感到恐惧不是我决定的 但是我可以决定如何面对恐惧 你可以充满恐惧得 生存下来 但是你也可以 战胜恐惧 振作起来，张开双臂 翱翔，飞得高高得，直到你可以碰到星星 那是我们每个人都想要去的地方
Thank you.
谢谢
(Applause)
（鼓掌）